Heerlijk! Even lachen met deze sarcastische ouders
De enige manier om het ouderschap te overleven is om soms even stil te staan, uit te zoomen en heel hard te lachen om de absurde situaties waarin je je dagelijks bevindt. Dat is tenminste wat onderstaande ouders doen.
1. Kun jij het niet gewoon doen?
6-year-old: Can you help me make my bed?
Me: Which part do you need help with?
6: The part where you do it for me.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 9, 2018
2. Wacht maar…
Me: I’m going to take you out and spend a bunch of money on you.
Kid: Yay!!!
Me: *takes kid to orthodontist*
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) December 13, 2018
3. Goed voorbeeld doet goed volgen
One of the hardest parts of parenting is pretending you like vegetables
— Sassparilla (@Megatronic13) September 9, 2018
4. Eh, liever niet…
4-year-old: Dad, can you come in the bathroom?
Me: Do you need help?
4: Bring Mom, too.
Pray for us.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 14, 2018
5. Als je kinderen hebt, ben je verloren
Before I had kids, I thought I had a great immune system, but it turns out I was just really good at staying away from the type of people who sneeze directly into your eyeballs while telling you a story.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) February 10, 2018
6. Tot over drie weken
3-year-old: *gets a shirt stuck on her head*
Me: Let me help you.
3: I DO IT MYSELF.
If you're expecting us today, we'll be about three weeks late.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 12, 2018
7. Dat is lekker thuiskomen
[makes my triumphant return home]
Me: Did you miss me?
6-year-old: You were gone?
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 15, 2019
8. Zoals dat altijd gaat
I told my kids we needed to leave 5 minutes early this morning & then we all laughed & laughed & left 20 minutes late as usual.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) December 12, 2018
9. Spoedcursus opvoeden
My 4-year-old freaked out because she had the hiccups didn't know what they were.
I told her it was an alien trying to burst out of her chest.
I might not be cut out for parenting.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 14, 2018
10. Sorry jongens, ik zie jullie daarna weer
In an effort to keep my house clean before we host Christmas, I’ve asked my family to move out.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) December 18, 2018
11. Kinderen doen zoals kinderen doen
We have a house full of chairs and couches, yet my 3-year-old chose to sit on a grocery bag full of bread.
You can't explain children. You just survive them.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 1, 2018
12. Het is een complexe emotie
Parenthood is hard to explain to people who haven’t had kids. Like, “It’s the best thing ever” and also “I’ve never been more stressed out, tired, frumpy, or poor in my entire life.”
— Mommy Owl (@Mommy__Owl) September 19, 2018
13. Praktisch onmogelijk
Being a parent puts you in excruciatingly difficult situations. For example, having to talk to other parents.
— Kate Hall (@KateWhineHall) October 31, 2018
14. Voor wat hoort wat
4-year-old: I was nice to my sisters.
Me: Thank you.
4: Can I have money now?
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 16, 2018
15. Je gaat nooit meer de deur uit, weet je hoe veel dat scheelt?
Sure kids cost roughly $14,000 annually, but think about all the money you save from no longer having a social life.
— Mommy Owl (@Mommy__Owl) October 7, 2018
16. Goed om te weten
Me: Your parent-teacher conference is coming up.
6-year-old: Oh.
Me: Is the anything I should know about?
6: No. I do all my bad stuff at home.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 18, 2018
Lees ook: Deze kinderen zijn niet alleen slimmer, maar ook grappiger dan wij
